Gym Bunny
Mirror , mirror, on the wall, who’s the sweatiest of them all? Surprise! It’s me! I provide here incontrovertible proof that Dolphin Fitness has never before seen such a sweaty lady as I. The best part about wearing this particular shirt to the gym is that I can gauge how hard I’m working by how far the giant sweat stain creeps down the Erika Lopez cartoon plastered with salt to my chest. Once I covered the whole image and victory was mine. It was a gross, slimy, victory that prompted others to gape in thinly masked disgust, but I didn’t care. On that day, I was the undeniable queen of sweat, and I ruled my kingdom with a just but damp hand.